Top Ten Signs you Bought the Wrong Computer

The biggest fear of any computer user is that you just blew several grand on a clunker that’s not even fit for a boat anchor. Try these dead giveaways on for size:

10. The monitor is certified for low emissions by JiffyLube.

9. The logo on your receipt: International House of Lame Computers.

8. The infrared cordless keyboard has only 15 keys, and one of them is marked Fast Forward.

7. You see the salesman you bought it from hawking genuine Rolexes on street corners.

6. The sound board and speakers are a separate unit, and they receive only AM.

5. The ad slogan: Ronald McDonald just grew up.

4. It has only two expansion slots, and they just popped up a couple of rounds of toast.

3. It’s labeled “energy saving” only because there’s no power supply.

2. You just got another one with your Happy Meal.

1. The sticker reads “nothing of value inside.”