The Night Before Y2K

Twas the night before Y2K
and all through the house
we all were in hiding,
me, my kids, and my spouse.

The firewood piled
floor to ceiling with care
the cupboards all packed
with non-perishables to spare.

The windows were barred
to protect us from looters
our new generator is safe
`cause it has no computers.

We’ve bought lots of gold
should the dollar collapse
and run up those credit cards
right to the max
and just in case
the banks should all crash
we closed our account
and spent all the cash
on dried foods and water
for our Y2K stash.

As the clock ticked toward midnight
we knew we’d soon learn
the doomsayers were right
it would all crash and burn.

Stretched out in my chair
with my gun in my lap
I decided to take a pre-Y2K nap.
I fell fast asleep
and then, without warning
I opened my eyes
and it was new year’s morning!

The lights were still on
the TV worked too
on all the news channels
there was nothing so new.

The only news
that sounded so bad
was the realization
I’d been Y2K-had.
What I thought was survival
was now but a fad.